Well, hello, dear readers! It's been awhile, I know. And believe me I wish it could've been different. But sometimes computers crash, sometimes hard drives are reformatted, and sometimes a webmaster just disables the feedback address.

Because of the aforementioned hard drive wipe, I did lose a good number of saved letters that I had planned to share with you, reader. But fear not, those that were lost were soon replaced by more.

And these are a few of them.

From: Kal
To: veryverygay@hotmail.com  
Subject: So bloody funny! 
Date: 8 Dec 2003

"Looking at your site, I laughed the hardest I've laughed in a while!  Personally, I am a staunch believer that Elijah and Dom are together, so, obviously, I believe that Elijah is gay. 

" I was reading the emails people have sent to you, and the one from the "English teacher" was one that I found most interesting.  First of all, I would hardly call that a "composition" as he did, since compositions tend to be longer and, quite frankly, without so many errors.  Come on, Each to their own and those who scrutinize shall parish in deep thought of self torment?  Aside from being disgustingly dramatic, spelled like that, "parish" is "an administrative part of a diocese that has its own church in the Anglican, Roman Catholic, and some other churches."  I found that particularly amusing, although perhaps it's just me.  He also needs to work on his comma usage; while I am told that I use too many, he seems to not know what they are.  Except in the last part ("P.S BTW I dare you say my composition is bad, I'm an English teacher.")  First off, it would be more correct to say "I dare you to say..."  Secondly, that should not be a comma, it should be a SEMICOLON!

"Right, I think I'm done.  I apologize for making this so long; I certainly had no intent on this becoming as long as it did.  I think your site is brilliant, and am going to tell all my friends (also supporters of Dom/Lijah) about it!"

We at veryverygay do love to hear from the True Believers. (Who said tinhats couldn't be grammar mavens?) Since this one is so friendly: B-

From: Megan
To: veryverygay@hotmail.com  
Subject: no subject
Date: 14 Dec 2003

Your site is a bunch of BS! The "conclusions" you make are absolutely,
completely ridiculous and full of it. There is no way that Elijah Wood is
gay. Numerous times Elijah has talked about and been seen with girlfriends.
I don't care if your site is a "parody" and is just a way to make fun of
how people jump to stupid conclusions. People are stupid and will believe
any crap they see or read. I don't think it's fair that you have this site,
because people will actually believe it when it isn't true! How would you
like it if you were straight and someone spread stupid rumors about how
they concluded you were gay? It's like those stupid high school websites
where people spread mean rumors about each other. It's cruel, shallow,
immature, and in my opinion not humorous at all. Oh, and I hope you
appreciate my correct spelling of words and correctness of grammar.
-Anonymous

And then, 19 minutes later, this hits the inbox:

Ok. I just read your disclaimer and I apologize for my previous letter. I
wrote it before I read the disclaimer, and I am sorry. However that does
not mean that I now think your site is cool. I still think that your site
is bs and should go away. Oh, and after I sent my previous letter, I
realized how stupid I was to put "Anonymous" at the bottom of my letter
when my name is obviously Megan. Lol. But, I just want to put my two cents
in by saying that I hate your site, and I think you're completely arrogant
and shallow when you say that abuse is amusing. My god! Are you crazy? I
don't think one bit of your site or any kind of abuse is amusing. You are
obviously mixed up and you need help.

Yeah. I really don't have anything to add. C

From: deserva
To: veryverygay@hotmail.com  
Subject: Elijah's Gaity
Date: 15 Dec 2003

To whom it may concern,
Can I please request that you split your excellent site in two?
Fans should have the option of viewing the 'Elijah is very very gay' site
alongside an 'Elijah is very very straight' site. You could then maximise
your fanbase/flamebase by annoying both homophobic idiots and rabid
slashers.
yours,
desevera

Post scriptum: The only problem with this plan is the lack of evidence for
Elijah being straight. I think it might not stand up to scrutiny as well as
your thoroughly-researched investigation into his gaity (I believe this is
the correct term, rather than 'gayness')

You may be right on all counts, fair deserva. In fact, the concept of "Elijah Wood is Very Very Straight" is one with which we have toyed, often. And while I do like the idea of annoying as many parts of fandom as possible, you'd be surprised just how many slashers do take offense to the site. It's all part of the magic. All part of the the Gay.

(Also, might it actually be "gaiety?") C+

From: bloodiedup@tumyeto.com
To: veryverygay@hotmail.com  
Subject: Elijah Wood is in fact gay
Date: 16 Dec 2003

Howdy,
This is Conor Oberst of the indie rock outfit, Bright Eyes, and I can confirm to
you that Elijah Wood is indeed gay. I met the little muffin while we filmed Spy
Kids 3-D (I played Demetra) and we've since hit it off. You should see this kid
perform. I mean, wow.
Tootles,
Conor O.

Bizarre. Just our style! B+

From: irishproverb2003
To: veryverygay@hotmail.com  
Subject: to freaks!!!
Date: 21 Dec 2003

How could u do such a thing,gay?U all r so crazy!!!rEMEMBER THIS--If u sat on u're friends lap u're GAY,If u hug u're friend u're Gay,if u stay with u're friend u're GAY ,OK.So what if he went out with Franka?? It's his life.U have no rights to say that he is gay. I know,u r jealous with elijah because he is with Franka,aren't u???
Maybe if u want tell make good evidence,why don't u make an interview with him.If he says he's gay,then we can trust u.But i guess u didn't tell him that u made this website.i think u're afraid.HAHAHA!!!CHICKENS!!!


TO HATERS,
U ALL KNOW HOW TO SAY BUT DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO!!!!!!
FREAKS SHALL WE CALL U, CHICKEN SHALL BE YOUR LOGO,&STUPIDS SHALL BE YOUR NAME!!!!!

I hate u so much.Why cant u think a something useful to do in u'r life rather being a stupid gay???U know what,why don't u make a website of your own.telling you r a gay or lesbian.What has he done to u that makes him deserves this.If u like him,then go tell him that.there's a website that can email to him.But if u hate him,why don't u forgive him,because if u don't forgive him, God won't forgive u too.I'm being very polite to u now although u made me very angry,when u say that.What you've done is unforgivable.All that i can say now is U R A FREAK & U R A CHICKEN & U R STUPID. I HATE YOU VERY MUCH!!!!

I don't have anything to say to that one, either, but I thought I'd just put that up there. Say it with me, now: "I HATE YOU VERY MUCH!" Poetic, in its own way. D

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